The Pure Love of Christ

I've always been the same person. But my life has been split into two parts. The first part was me when I had energy. I started a non profit to help try to solve a tiny portion of the world's problems. I tutored teenagers for the ACT for free. I babysit for friends. I wrote books. I ran marathons. I was always trying to do more and be better. 

The second part was me after I got sick. I still try to do more and be better. But I'm constantly frustrated by my limitations. I dropped the tutoring, closed down the non profit. I don't run or write books. 

I always subconsciously equated doing more good to being a "better" person. But I'm still the same person! Actually, having to slow down has allowed me time to evaluate what's in my heart, and what I've found hasn't all been good. Doing less "good" has allowed me to relieve some stress and help me get to a better level of "good" in my heart. 

Here is the main thing I've realized, though: no matter how much "good" you are or aren't doing in this world, it will never be enough. Oh, it might be enough to satisfy yourself. You might think, 'spending 40 hours a week helping people definitely means I'm going to heaven.' Guess what, it doesn't. 

Are we like Christ? Are we truly like Him? Would we be willing to do anything God asks of us? Would we give up everything we possess, our lives, our reputations? Do we desire to serve Him and love like Him more than anything? Or are we pretty content loving ourselves for all the "good" we're doing without actually understanding the souls we so magnanimously help in their lowly state? 

I wish all of us the opportunity to not be able to do much "good" for a season and to really reflect on the true source of Goodness. He is the only One who can save us. He is the only one who can change our hearts to the point that we can truly love every soul we meet. Then our service will be true and our "good" works will be good.